Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Be Good To Yourself Therapy


Be Good To Yourself Therapy

Trust yourself. You know what you want and need.

Put yourself first. You can't be anything for anybody else unless you take care of yourself.

Let your feelings be known. They are important.

Express your opinions. It's good to hear yourself talk.

Value your thinking. You do it well. If you don't value it, no one else will.

Take the time and space you need.. Even if other people are wanting something from you.

When you need something, don't talk yourself out of it. Even if you can't have it, it's OK to need.

When you are scared, let someone know. Isolating yourself when you're scared makes it worse.

When you feel like running away, let yourself feel the scare. Think about what you fear will happen and decide what you need to do.

When you're angry, let yourself feel the anger. Decide what you want to do; just feel it, express it, or take some action.

When you're sad, think about what would be comforting. When you're hurt, tell the person who hurt you. Keeping it inside makes it grow.

When you have work to do and you don't want to do it, decide what really needs to be done and what can wait.

When you want something from someone else, ask. You'll be okay if they say no. Asking is being true to yourself.

When you need help, ask. Trust people to say no if they don't want to give.

When people turn you down, it usually has to do with them, and not with you. Ask someone else for what you need.

When you feel alone, know there are people who want to be with you. Fantasize what it would be like to be with each of them. Decide if you want to make that happen.

When you feel anxious, let yourself know that in your head. You've moved into the future to something scary your body has gotten up the energy for it. Come back to the present.

When you want to say something loving to someone, go ahead. Expressing your feeling is not a commitment.

When someone yells at you, physically support yourself by relaxing into your chair or putting your feet firmly on the floor. Remember to breathe. Think about the message they are trying to get across to you.

When you're harassing yourself, stop. You do it when you need something. Figure out what you need and get it.

When everything seems wrong, you are overwhelmed and need some comforting. Ask for it. Afterwards, you can think about what you need to do.

When you want to talk to someone new and are scared, breathe. Don't start rehearsing, just plunge in. If it doesn't go well, you can stop.

If you're doing something you don't like to do, (such as smoking or overeating), Stop. Think about what you really want. If you're stuck and can't think clearly, talk out loud to someone.

When you can't think straight, Stop thinking. Feel.

When you're in need of love, reach out. There are people who love you.

When you're confused, it's usually because you think you should do one thing and you want to do another. Dialogue with yourself or present both sides to a friend.

When you feel harried, slow down. Deliberately slow your breathing, your speech, and your movements.

When you have tears, cry. When you feel like crying and it's not a safe place to cry, acknowledge your pain and promise yourself a good cry later. Keep your promise.

When everything seems gray, look for color.

If one of these rules seems wrong for you, talk about it with someone. Then, rewrite it so it fits you.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Bend But Don't Break


An Inspiring Read ♥ Read, Love and Learn
Bend, but Don't Break
One of my fondest memories as a child is going by the river and sitting idly on the bank. There I would enjoy the peace and quiet, watch the water rush downstream, and listen to the chirps of birds and the rustling of leaves in the trees. I would also watch the bamboo trees bend under pressure from the wind and watch them return gracefully to their upright or original position after the wind had died down.

When I think about the bamboo tree's ability to bounce back or return to its original position, the word resilience comes to mind. When used in reference to a person this word means the ability to readily recover from shock, depression or any other situation that stretches the limits of a person's emotions.

Have you ever felt like you are about to snap? Have you ever felt like you are at your breaking point? Thankfully, you have survived the experience to live to talk about it.

During the experience you probably felt a mix of emotions that threatened your health. You felt emotionally drained, mentally exhausted and you most likely endured unpleasant physical symptoms.

Life is a mixture of good times and bad times, happy moments and unhappy moments. The next time you are experiencing one of those bad times or unhappy moments that take you close to your breaking point then bend but don't break. Try your best not to let the situation get the best of you.

A measure of hope will take you through the unpleasant ordeal. With hope for a better tomorrow or a better situation, things may not be as bad as they seem to be. The unpleasant ordeal may be easier to deal with if the end result is worth having.

If the going gets tough and you are at your breaking point, show resilience like the bamboo tree, bend, but don't break!

A Glass Of Milk


Life lessons can be learned from short stories...although, longer than the usual quotes...the depth of absorbing the moral lessons from the story is far greater...another beautiful read, sharing it with you guys ♥ Read, Love and Learn

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water.

She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"

"You don't owe me anything," she replied. "Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness."

He said..... "Then I thank you from my heart." As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.

Year's later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the nameof the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.

Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval.

He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill.

She read these words.....

"Paid in full with one glass of milk"

(Signed)
Dr. Howard Kelly

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You, God, that Your love has spread abroad through human hearts and hands."

A Box Of Kisses


A must read ♥
The story goes that some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree.

Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, "This is for you, Daddy." He was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found the box was empty.

He yelled at her, "Don't you know that when you give someone a present, there's supposed to be something inside it?"

The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said,"Oh, Daddy, it is not empty. I blew kisses into the box. All for you, Daddy."

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgiveness.

It is told that the man kept that gold box by his bed for years and whenever he was discouraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

In a very real sense, each of us as humans have been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, friends, family and God. There is no more precious possession anyone could hold.

A Mother's Love

A heartwarming read ♥ Read, Love and Learn
A Mother's Love
A little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper, and handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his Mom dried her hands on an apron, she read it, and this is what it said:

For cutting the grass: $5.00
For cleaning up my room this week: $1.00
For going to the store for you: $.50
Baby-sitting my kid brother while you went shopping: $.25
Taking out the garbage: $1.00
For getting a good report card: $5.00
For cleaning up and raking the yard: $2.00
Total owed: $14.75

Well, his mother looked at him standing there, and the boy could see the memories flashing through her mind. She picked up the pen, turned over the paper he'd written on, and this is what she wrote:

For the nine months I carried you while you were growing inside me:
No Charge
For all the nights that I've sat up with you, doctored and prayed for you:
No Charge
For all the trying times, and all the tears that you've caused through the years:
No Charge
For all the nights that were filled with dread and for the worries I knew were ahead:
No Charge
For the toys, food, clothes, and even wiping your nose:
No Charge
Son, when you add it up, the cost of my love is:
No Charge.

When the boy finished reading what his mother had written, there were big tears in his eyes, and he looked straight at his mother and said, "Mom, I sure do love you." And then he took the pen and in great big letters he wrote: "PAID IN FULL".

I Want To Buy A Miracle


A must read ♥ Read, Love and Learn
I Want To Buy A Miracle
An eight-year-old child heard her parents talking about her little brother. All she knew was that he was very sick and they had no money left. They were moving to a smaller house because they could not afford to stay in the present house after paying the doctor's bills. Only a very costly surgery could save him now and there was no one
to loan them the money.

When she heard her daddy say to her tearful mother with whispered desperation, 'Only a miracle can save him now', the little girl went to her bedroom and pulled her piggy bank from its hiding place in the closet. She poured all the change out on the floor and counted it carefully.

Clutching the precious piggy bank tightly, she slipped out the back door and made her way six blocks to the local drugstore. She took a quarter from her bank and placed it on the glass counter.
"
And what do you want?" asked the pharmacist.

"It's for my little brother," the girl answered back. "He's really very sick and I want to buy a miracle."

"I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist.

"His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my daddy says only a miracle can save him. So how much does a miracle cost?"

"We don't sell miracles here, child. I'm sorry," the pharmacist said, smiling sadly at the little girl.

"Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I can try and get some more. Just tell me how much it costs."

In the shop was a well-dressed customer. He stooped down and asked the little girl, "What kind of a miracle does you brother need?"

"I don't know," she replied with her eyes welling up. "He's really sick and mommy says he needs an operation. But my daddy can't pay for it, so I have brought my savings".

"How much do you have?" asked the man.

"One dollar and eleven cents; but I can try and get some more", she answered barely audibly.

"Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man, "A dollar and eleven cents - the exact price of a miracle for little brothers."

He took her money in one hand and held her hand with the other. He said, "Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the kind of miracle you need."

That well-dressed man was Dr Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specialising in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed without charge and it wasn't long before Andrew was home again and doing well.

"That surgery," her mom whispered, "was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost."

The little girl smiled. She knew exactly how much the miracle cost ... one dollar and eleven cents ... plus the faith of a little child.
Perseverance can make miracles happen!

Remember Those Who Serve You




A must read ♥ Read, Love and Learn

Always remember those who serve you.In the days, when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 years old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him."How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked."Fifty cents," replied the waitress.The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it."Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient."Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.The little boy again counted his coins."I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies.You see he couldn't have the sundae, because he wanted enough left to leave her a tip.

The Wooden Bowl


A frail old man lived with his son, his daughter-in-law, and his four-year-old grandson. His eyes were blurry, his hands trembled, and his step faltered.

The family would eat together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon, drooping to the floor. When he grasped his glass of milk, it often spilled clumsily at the tablecloth.

With this happening almost every night, the son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.

"We must do something about grandfather," said the son.

"I've had enough of his milk spilling, noisy eating and food on the floor," the daughter-in-law agreed.

So the couple set a small table at the corner.

There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed their dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in wooden bowls. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening, before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly: "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy replied, "Oh, I'm making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

These words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears streamed down their cheeks. Though no words were spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening, the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.

For the remainder of his days, grandfather ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk was spilled or the table cloth was soiled. —Unknown
Our limitations should not be tainted by limitations and difficulties. Read, Love and Learn

Mending Objects The Japanese Way

It's important to know that any emotional damage we face in life is something that can be fixed and mended. It's a choice to want to heal those hurts that have made us broken at one point in time. As we restore ourselves...we emerge with a stronger and more beautiful spirit, ready to take on life once again.-Rubyanne

Thanks For Your Time


A MUST READ ♥
Thanks for Your Time
Read, Love and Learn

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday."

Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important... Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time.

The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture... Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said.

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'" Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention.

"Mr. Harold Belser" it read.

Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside.

"Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

"Jack, Thanks for your time! -Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most...was...my time."

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way, Janet... thanks for your time!"

To The World You May Be One...

To the world you may be one person but to one person you may be the world.  Cherish the people who sincerely love and care for you.  Never take them for granted.  Take the time to let them know that you appreciate and value them in your life.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

It's October and It's the Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

This annual campaign is to increase the awareness of breast cancer.  It's the time to encourage all women to take the steps and tests to detect this disease in the early stages.  Let's all support this great cause.



We Don't Meet People By Accident

I wrote this because I truly believe that we don't meet people by accident.  They were meant to cross our path for a reason.  To perhaps love us, teach us, guide us and care for us at a time we needed it the most.  So no matter what it is, be thankful. Rubyanne

Life As A Ferris Wheel

Life is like a ferris wheel...sometimes we are up and sometimes we are down.  As we go thru the motion.   May we learn the valuable lessons of life.  That no matter the cycle, we are assured that being down would not last forever.  For eventually, we will be up again.  Rubyanne

The Things You Hear

The thing to remember is this...not everything we hear are 100% accurate.  It's not good to judge others based on what people say.  We never really know their story and their experiences till we have lived their life.  Each choices we make are greatly influenced by our past so to judge another based on their decisions would be totally unfair.  Rubyanne

A Quiet Walk

At times when confusion arises.  One of the best things to do is to take a quiet walk to clear ones thoughts.  Hopefully after, you can pacify your emotions and have some peace of mind. Rubyanne

Stay Positive

It's important to stay positive at all times.  Regardless of the situation, there is always hope of overcoming the negative aspect of life.  Rubyanne

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Wisdom and Strength


When you face a trying time in your life with profound sadness.  You become more unified with yourself.  Simply because you know that you must overcome the situation on our own....you hurt, you cry, you cope, you heal and you eventually survive the ordeal.  The process helps you become more knowledgable and mature.  For indeed, "The greatest thing you gain after every trial is wisdom and strength." Rubyanne